Asking for help - Wedding Wow or Woe?
This post comes to you after the wedding and now when I reflect back on the past few months and especially the days leading up to the wedding I regret not asking for help.
I was one of those brides who decided that I would do everything on my own (the groom was to busy in another country to help around with the planning). From the invitations, to the wedding favours, from finalising the decor to picking out the photographer, I took on everything and luckily succeed (not without being stressed and loosing a lot of sleep). My family was around to help so I let them handle the big stuff, providing everything went through me and had my stamp of approval at the end (I was Bridezilla at times). But once the major decisions were done with it was the little things that were the most time consuming and even those I took on myself. I designed and customised the t-shirts and got them printed which I could have just outsourced to a friend. I sat through almost every dance rehearsal which I really didn't need to. I also designed the website, set up the social media accounts and managed them as much as I could, which again any of my teenage nieces would have loved to (snapchat thrives on teenagers!).
The list is endless but why did I do this? Well one of the reasons was that I needed everything to be perfect, just the way I pictured it in my head and more importantly I felt bad about troubling the people around me. My family was already doing more than enough and my friends were all busy with their lives, even though they offered to help I couldn't get myself to put that pressure on them.
But you know what? That is exactly what family and friends are for! We are not supposed to take people for granted, but when you are the bride and you genuinely ask (and thank people) for help, everybody comes out to help alleviate your stress. This doesn't mean you should be lazy or boss people around. Just give out clear instructions on what needs to be done, how it needs to be done (because everyone is human and mistakes are bound to happen) and by when. Sticking to a timeline is very important if you want to be stress free at the wedding.
So go on, if you are a bride or groom to be, ask for HELP! At the end of the day make sure to keep a check on the things you have outsourced, because some people may actually forget all about it and you will too. I speak from experience, I asked my fiance to take care of something and he asked someone else to do it and till I realised the goof up, I was already married!
I was one of those brides who decided that I would do everything on my own (the groom was to busy in another country to help around with the planning). From the invitations, to the wedding favours, from finalising the decor to picking out the photographer, I took on everything and luckily succeed (not without being stressed and loosing a lot of sleep). My family was around to help so I let them handle the big stuff, providing everything went through me and had my stamp of approval at the end (I was Bridezilla at times). But once the major decisions were done with it was the little things that were the most time consuming and even those I took on myself. I designed and customised the t-shirts and got them printed which I could have just outsourced to a friend. I sat through almost every dance rehearsal which I really didn't need to. I also designed the website, set up the social media accounts and managed them as much as I could, which again any of my teenage nieces would have loved to (snapchat thrives on teenagers!).
The list is endless but why did I do this? Well one of the reasons was that I needed everything to be perfect, just the way I pictured it in my head and more importantly I felt bad about troubling the people around me. My family was already doing more than enough and my friends were all busy with their lives, even though they offered to help I couldn't get myself to put that pressure on them.
But you know what? That is exactly what family and friends are for! We are not supposed to take people for granted, but when you are the bride and you genuinely ask (and thank people) for help, everybody comes out to help alleviate your stress. This doesn't mean you should be lazy or boss people around. Just give out clear instructions on what needs to be done, how it needs to be done (because everyone is human and mistakes are bound to happen) and by when. Sticking to a timeline is very important if you want to be stress free at the wedding.
So go on, if you are a bride or groom to be, ask for HELP! At the end of the day make sure to keep a check on the things you have outsourced, because some people may actually forget all about it and you will too. I speak from experience, I asked my fiance to take care of something and he asked someone else to do it and till I realised the goof up, I was already married!
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